I got a text the other day. It was a pretty exciting one. John (my friend, turned husband of Jessica ie: funniest person on the planet) asked if I would go on a girl's trip with his wife for her birthday. Was that a question? Did he even have to ask me? Holy canoli!!! He told me Andrea (the other funniest person on the planet) was going too and asked if he should invite anyone else. I gave him a list of who I thought Jess (she wasn't aware of any of this) would have fun with. I mentioned jokingly that no one else is as embarrassing as us, and he agreed, so no one else was invited:-)
These girls MADE my college experience. They literally laughed me through the whole degree and kept me laughing while I was on my mission. They sent scandaous pictures to the mission home, and calenders full of old memories. These two make me HAPPY!! So what better way to celebrate Jess than to fly to St. George and be happy together for a few days!! It was bound to be epic!
We stayed up REALLY late giggling (because we could) and then wouldn't go to sleep because we were too scared to sleep alone without our husbands. Jess kindly pointed out that the black and white ancestral photo of a creepy old man would keep me company for the evening. It was almost as bad as when my cat Pumpkin died in college and they decorated my room at the Chi-O house with pictures they had drawn of Pumpkin dead in the ground with only his tail unburied. Meow.
I had only heard of the Swig cookie that entices cars to wait around the block for a bite. So we decided to do the same thing except we didn't wait. We parked and walked in. Lazy Mormons!
They wait in that drive-through for an hour and then eat one of these. I'd have to say they're TOTALLY worth the wait AND calories!!
Which is what this fellow Jenny Craiger thought too until she saw me taking a picture of her in a Swig drive-through and bailed before even getting up to the window. She was sooooo close!! I guess it was bad for business being a "diet company" and all. But wasn't it "bad for business" being seen that entire hour waiting in line?
We spent that hour sitting on these broken plastic chairs in the Swig parking lot. We didn't have to be anywhere and there were no children telling us otherwise, so that parking lot was where we'd stay for a while. We ended up staying there long enough realize it had been hours and we had talked ourselves into a dinner appetite. We also decided that we were really cute in our stripes.
We spent some time at the pool and wondered how we ever "laid out" for hours on end back in the day. It was so bloody hot!! We also "oohed and ahhed" over Jess's perfect toes. She could seriously be a foot model!
I wore a bikini for the first time since giving birth to Jack because I knew the girls wouldn't judge the shriveled, wrinkled and stretch marked skin. I had high hopes that a little sun tan would miraculously fade the tiger stripes and make me look like a supermodel. Turns out, the stretch marks didn't fade one bit and the skin....well... still as shriveled as ever. Upside? We got a pretty good laugh at all the disgusting shapes I could make out of all the leftover skin.
We played a little tennis too. There was a teenager on the court when we got there. We pretty much kicked him off but took pity on him and asked if he wanted to play with us. I asked him how old he thought we were and he said 25. I decided he should be my doubles partner. Poor kid. I'm a lousy tennis player and couldn't see with out my glasses. We also had Chinese food the night before and with all the running and bending over to swing that racquet, the poor kid had to hear and smell some pretty foul farts as well. I had no control over them! They just kept coming out!! I think his opinion of how old we were changed after that.
At dinner one night Jess and I discovered that we have the EXACT same color of eyes. We had to take pictures...of course!
Then we laughed at our pictures because we're immature like that.
We also laughed at how messy we were at the condo. Again, probably because we could be. No need to clean up after ANYONE on this trip!! We decided to leave everything in the front room on the table so we wouldn't "forget something" later when we packed up. Don't mind the 80's prom shoes on the left. I met up with Emily at the Olson's condo to get some 80's attire because you never know when you're going to need to play dress up in Texas. Don't ask:-)
We decided that because we were in St. George, we should probably take a hike somewhere. We went up Snow Canyon and found a trail that looked kind of hard (we didn't want to overexert ourselves) and half way through realized we didn't want to hike anymore. It was too bloody hot again!! And because we didn't have to, we didn't. Trudging through the sand was getting old, so we found a cool shaded little cave and sat in there for another hour for some more girl talk. I could probably walk from sea to shining sea talking to these ladies. It's never ending how much I love being with them.
We were VERY enthusiastic about the fact that some people switched seats with us so we could all sit together on the plane. It's the little things people. Made our doggy day I tell ya! That long 30 minute flight would be so much more bearable now!
At the SLC airport I starting tearing up a bit on the way up the escalator. Why do all good things have to come to an end? Why do we have to be grown-ups anyway? We gave our hugs and I cried some more and then I called Chase and cried a little more to him. I hate goodbyes.
The only thing that made me feel better was looking at these pictures Chase texted me from home. I missed my little family. It was time to get my snuggles on!
The trip was definitely epic. Here's a big shout out to John for making the whole thing possible!! Us "embarrassments" are truly grateful!!
